As I Look to The Stars....

As i look to the stars i go deeper and deeper in search of my own truth. Seeking for what i don't know or pretend not to know, but seek it i must. Whether in clear blue sky or deep plankton enriched sea i search for that answer that would set me free. The search for me has not always been easy or perhaps i have made it a task for myself. Life they say is not meant to be difficult, we live some and we...live some more. Maybe that's what i say. All i know for sure now is to experience it as it flows me by just like in a dive...when in a cool current experience the coolness of the waters and when in a warm current BE warm. Warm or cold the current will pass me by and so will the beauty of the sea and the fishes, hence I experience it and take it all in.

I take it all in a breath cos to me living life is about the hot & cold.

Ahoy There...

Oh Capt my Capt...

Where do i go? Shall i hoist anchor, set a path and sail towards it or do i set out the sails, look to the stars and let them lead me to the wild blue yonder with the wind behind my back and the open ocean of life in front of me?

Where or where? Let me look to the stars...

The Ugly Truth

Let’s begin with the ugly truth. This came about after watching the movie with the same name…The Ugly Truth…starring Katherine Heigl & Gerard Butler.

As is always after a movie we share about the movie. The movie was hilarious but there was also a tinge of hard truths that many amongst us would refuse to see or rather choose to avoid....i am one guilty of such. Topics about relationship always have been interesting and this movie was one such movie and many a time the content hit home. We shared about stuff way into the night and I guess some hard and ugly truths came up. Realizations of one reality may not always be the path that we choose for in that path lies great courage and strength to muster taking action. Therefore steadying the course may not be easier either because in that path too lies great strength and courage to forge ahead and make things work.

In the end I guess it’s how far are we willing to go before we decide to change course. When is it an act of love and when does it become an insane endeavour. Wither ends love and insanity begins?

The Journey so far...

The journey thus far has included an LP, the 128th LP after Legacy, a celebration in Langkawi, an adventure through Gunung Tahan and a dive with the Whale Shark in the waters of Pulau Tenggol.

The past three months has been one hell of a rollercoaster ride through work, relationship and an LP journey. Why oh why would one choose such a crazy life to begin with? Why not? What is life if it were not to be lived? I chose this stretch! Much was the learning but only after the fact. Such is the demands of experience. Highs and lows are but the thrills of a life well lived...i guess it's not a bed of roses all the time besides how can the Good exist without the Bad to accompany it? How then would we experience what good is in the absence of what’s bad? Now comes the time for me to once again document the highs and lows of an adventure & lately...drama ridden life. Where do I begin after so many moons of neglecting this space?

Where do i begin...

Turbulance

As i mentioned it has been a crazy week and i don't think the craziness will subside anytime soon. It has to go though it's own rite of passage and i have to go thru mine. It's coming wave after wave and i stand and listen & hearing the murmurs of the heart, the voices of one and also the voices of the many and i take it all in and wonder...

What do i do next?

Conversations

Talk talk talk talk...there's been a lot of it lately. No good no bad...just loads of feedback. Much information to process and much to ponder on. Much to reflect and new choices to make.

It's been that sort of a week for me. There's been much of venting, bitching and all that shit by me too...much is there to clear from this system of mine. Everybody has their opinion of how things should be, ought to be and only way to be and I have Mine. Conflicting as it may seem and will always be thru time eternal. Thing is we will always have our own opinions based on our life history cos that is where our learnings and experience has brought us.

Be it right or wrong is left to the experiencing.

Fearless Roo

It's August in a blink of an eye and 9 months have past since i met this Fearless Roo. In this time i have been to Phuket, Redang and it's depths, Langkawi & even Jakarta...which i would not want to go back again unless it was absolutely necessary.

Much have i wanted to blog about the destinations and my experience but i can't seem to sit still long enough to do so. I am now doing my best to blog as much as i can but alas some of the experience is as they say...moment over, hence it will probably not see the light of day unless some moment of inspiration evokes in me a desire to do so otherwise...it will be as it is. Most of these places and experiences are in a part of my relationship with the Fearless Roo. Just as in the picture, she is in real life...Fearless. She would nonchalantly jump off a waterfall, a yatch and swim round the house reef of Redang Reef Resort without fear. Shark dive with the Great Whites is not a bother, what more chasing after 5ft long white tips to get a shot on her underwater Olympus. The Sea is her passion. I love the beach but she has opened me to the beauties of the sea and i owe my diving to her. She has expanded my world.

Is there anything she Fears...i wonder.

As Beckham Watches.

After my visit with the Doc and the minor surgery that followed, i went to the barbers to hav my head shaven. This is a stretch for me. My first thoughts of having a shaven head came when i was 16 but i only got as far as a crew cut. This time i had to have it clean shaven cos i gave my word. It began with a conversation about my Tahan trip with Baby Kangaroo and she asked if Her Royal Pinkness was following and i told her that if she did i would shave my head. HRP is a supermom but the outdoors is something she resist. She is not one to get all hot and sweaty...by trekking in the jungle that is... otherwise i don't know la. She gave me a shock and thus my hairloss by calling me one day a couple of weeks ago and asked me stuff about Tahan and said that the LandRover Guy asked her to come along and she agreed! Hahaha I'm glad she is joining us but i'm still in shock.

I kept my word and hence the visit to Kedai Gunting Ananda.

A Piece of My Head

It all started with a bloody pimple which i ripped off with my grimy fingers and unknowingly infected one of my blood vessels and this mutated to the little lump you see below. I tried removing it by pinching the damn thing but it just wouldn't budge instead it starts to bleed everytime i towel off after a bath. So i was walkin around with a bleeddin head. It bleeds when ever i accidentally nudge it. Finally upon multiple insistance by Joey i went to the doctors. This then led to my visit with Dr Karpal Singh at Pantai Medical Ctr who lobbed it off and cauterised the root of my vein. All in all it took 30mins and i had a hole in my crown but the bleedin head was successfully arrested.

It was so uncool having that nipple looking thing sticking out of my head. It looked like a reset button. Was a fraid that a mouse or rat may mistake it for it's mom's tits and come suck on it so i was better off having it removed besides it was difficult looking good with that damn thing sticking out of my head. :)

Clowning with the Clowns

One of the most recognizable fishes in the sea next to the shark that is...is the clown fish, better known as Nemo. They are definately friendlier than the shark or i would not be messing with them. My first encounter with deep was pretty cool. Getting up close and personal with the Clowns and basically it's kinda like National Geographic Live! One more fear handled, just as Robin Sharma ordered...Run to your Fear! I did and i am enjoying it. Now i look forward to more dives.

Am i still scared of the Deep. Oh yes i am but life is for the experiencing is it not? Here i come...

Lynn's Patience

Beyond the frolicking Clowns hovers my trainer...Lynn. She is patient, caring and very nurturing. My pool sessions with her were very calming session. You see i have this fear of being underwater. I can swim but being underwater and breathing through my mouth is something very unnatural for me. I am a trekker and i breathe thru my nose. Lynn's patience gave me confidence to take one more step into the unknown. During my first few dives she always kept a watchful eye on me which made me feel safe.

Thanx Lynn.